"Tu sei molto romantica" / "You are very romantic" - is a comment I have heard way too many times recently, actually making me wonder whether I really am exactly that, or whether people are just being nasty and sarcastic time and again to my face.
Of course, if you ask SN, his very prompt comment would be that this "filminess" is a result of me being a product of the KJo generation Bollywood movies and that an overdose of ridiculous romantic movies has had a mind numbing impact on me. Though I have to tell you I really don't think he is complaining and am almost certain that there is nothing for him to complain about ;)
But once again I can't help reflect ....what the hell does it mean to be romantic today? And is it not, even in today's fast paced, impersonal times, universally considered a virtue?
For starters there is a Wiki How to be romantic link that I confess I did skim through. And as I did, I wondered more than before as to why it is up in the first place and without undermining the resourcefulness of Wikipedia in any way, I am still questioning whether it merely attempts to tell us what we already almost clearly knew? or whether there really are people for whom this is rocket science. :)
What were one whole generation of parents doing raising their kids without two important values compassion and passion, so much so that they actually need an online tutorial on "how to be just that" ?
Because personally I feel that being romantic is all about being both compassionate to someone & passionate about something. And for those amongst my family and friends who are that, its way beyond red roses on Valentine's day, gifts for Xmas and surprise holidays at some exotic spa.
Instead its very likely to be about a simple home cooked meal for two, flowers adorning your home without any occasion, shopping for yourself and others simply because your paycheck was encashed that very day, connecting long distance because you miss someone, nostalgically looking back at coffee dates with colleagues, movie marathons with your sister and Friday night movie dates with caramel popcorn, taking your nieces and nephews for a joy ride in your new car and leaving post it notes for someone on the bathroom mirror .....in short constantly and consistently saying "I Care for You" ...without any occasion, just because you felt like it.
In this regard, I guess most of us have a long long way to go, but perhaps consciousness is the very first step in this journey. And at the end of this journey , if you've successfully been a die hard romantic, this is what your epitaph (scripted by the people who knew you) would say -
"She has attained the permanence
She dreamed of,
where old stones lie sunning.
Untended stalks blow over her,
Even and swift,
like young men running.
Always in the heart she loved
Others had lived,—she heard their laughter.
She lies where none has lain before,
Where certainly none will follow after."
(Epitaph for a romantic woman by - Louise Bogan)
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